A Lovers Toil
Once upon a time there was a heartless man, he didn’t care for others and compassion he couldn’t understand
His heart was cold there was no love inside, although to the outside world he carried on as though he was fine
Until one fateful night he is visited by a dream, and it tells him that he needs to change his ways, or his life will fall apart at the seams
He lays down his head and ignores the vision that he saw, he arrogantly pushes the thought to the side believing he’ll always have it all
He awakens to the sound of someone weeping softly, he looks around and there she sits crying herself to sleep
He reaches out to touch her, but he can’t understand, how she is here when he left her and let go of her hand
She is just an apparition a figment in his mind, but he knows that he was wrong and now he must pay for his crime
He tries to hold her and tell her not to fear, that he doesn’t want her to be sad that she should shed no more tears
He can’t console her, and she continues to weep, he asks her why she is there her secret he will keep
She looks right through him and says “don’t you understand? You’re the reason I am this way why couldn’t you leave me like a man?”
He is taken aback, and he ponders what she means, and the clarity sinks in and he starts to see
He was taken back to the past where she once held his heart, and she takes him all the way to the end where he tore her dreams apart
He looks at himself and watches the expression on his face, it doesn’t seem to affect him, and he vanished without a trace
He can’t believe that he ever treated her this way, and so he asks her the truth and listens to what she has to say
She tells him that this is a lesson that he needs to learn, that once he held love in his heart but now it only burns
She grabs onto his face and kisses him one last time, she tells him that she must go there will soon be another surprise
He wakes up from what he thought was just a surreal dream, and there he sees the one he is with now and wonders what this means
She is sitting there pondering his thoughts, and all the while he wonders is this it? Has he finally been caught?
Does she know about his past and what he had done? Does she know that long ago he left his only one?
He shakes his head and tells himself there is just no way, I covered my tracks back then and said all that there was to say
I just imagined her she wasn’t just here, so there is no way that she saw her I have nothing to fear
And so, the story continues and starts to unfold, she tells him that he must pay the price for all the lies he has told
He looks at her baffled and seems to be appalled, she looks at him and says “you know the cause”
“Don’t be so aloof and pretend that you don’t know, you set this story in motion this is your show”
She takes him back to the beginning before he had found the one, and shows him when he was happy with her and makes him see what he has done
She asks him what happened? How did they lose their way? And he is in shock and has nothing to say
He doesn’t want to see them that way and remember when, he tells her his heart is closed off and that they can never be that way again
She slowly shakes her head and she complies, she tells him that is your choice this is your demise
He awakens again, and wonders was that just a dream? And he looks over to the bed where she had been sitting moments ago it seems
No one is there and so he takes a collective sigh, and then he sees her, and she tells him your about to understand why
She tells him she wants to show him what will come to be, and so she grabs his hand and says follow me
He doesn’t know this girl, but she tells him he doesn’t need to know her name, that all will be forgiven in time and all will be explained
He sees himself much older than how he now appears, and he watches as he looks miserable and sheds unwanted tears
He turns to ask her what has become of me? And she softly replies “you drowned in your own misery”
You let your mind fool you and you let it tear you apart, you walked away from love and the one that had your heart
I showed you the past as her so that you could see, just how happy you were then and that you two were meant to be
I disguised myself as the one you’re with now to show you that pain that your causing her to feel, you don’t care that she is hurting because you yourself can’t feel
You don’t care for others because you’re miserable in your life, but you made your own bed to lie in not once but twice
She tells him to go to sleep now and when he awakens, he must make a change, to continue to be unhappy or to change his ways
She tells him that he already knows the answer and he could be happy, but he must take the step on his own to change his destiny
He awakens the next morning and the sun is shining like never before, was it all a dream? He isn’t sure
He thinks about what he was told last night from the visitor by his bed, and he knows what he must do and what lies ahead
He tells the one he is with he is sorry he must go, that he should never have come back he should have stayed in the past where his love could grow
He runs away and tells himself I am finally free, I can break away form these chains that have been imprisoning me
He can see her face so clearly now, and as he looks at her, he wonders to himself, how?
How did I ever leave her, why didn’t I stay? He tells her I have seen my future and I no longer want to be the man I am today
I want my heart to beat again I want to feel the blood flow, I don’t want to live in misery, I want to feel whole
I want you, I need you, you’re my future, my present, my past, and I will live the rest of my life with you and our love will always last.
This Poem is from my book titled Fairytales of Broken Dreams available on Amazon Kindle and for purchase. My Pen Name is Amanda Carroll Kinzer
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