Answers
I just wanted to let you know,
That I have heard your prayer.
Because I had to answer no,
You thought I was unfair.
I will not cause a limousine
To crush your girlfriend's cat.
I will not make Albert Pujols
Break his favorite bat.
I do not care if your Vikings
Have lost four Superbowls.
And I won’t assist your Redwings
In scoring extra goals.
I won't give Glen Beck a seizure,
Or have Britney pose nude.
And I can’t force Eminem to
Adjust his attitude.
And by the way, while we're at it,
Will you stop asking me,
To give you the winning numbers,
For your state lottery?
It seems that nearly all your prayers
Ask me to make you rich!
Do you think I'm a leprechaun,
A wizard or a witch?
Another thing…when you make love
I'll ask you to refrain,
From waking up your neighborhood,
By screaming out MY name!
I cannot prevent the mailman
From sleeping with your wife.
Anymore than I can force you
To somehow get a life.
There are rules that must be followed,
Some things I can't fulfill.
It is because I love you all,
That I gave you free will.
If there's a choice that must be made,
I'll whisper in your ear.
But every choice is yours to make,
I cannot interfere.
So if you ask, when next you pray,
To be a tennis pro.
I hope that you will understand
When I must answer no.
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