Crossroads
Please God, have mercy on my soul.
Pour cold oceans, make me whole.
Let it soak the sins of my foes
and let it heal the wound that they tore.
They speak words I can not comprehend.
The time they’ve spent as friends, is longer than the forever I held in my hands.
It makes no sense, although I’ve tried to understand,
I grow weaker in time and barely rise to stand.
Words should not have been spoken in the first place,
had they considered my fate.
Mistakes take moments,
choices have dates.
It’s far beyond the faults we’ve made.
The truth is lost in tortured aches.
This should never have been me and you,
we were supposed to grow together and always be true.
Never harm each other, calm each other’s rain,
I still waited, hoped that you would wake.
I walk away, this time forever,
though I swear this line to me is hard to sever.
I for one, am clear of conscience,
I did mistakes, but had one option.
Her.
Though I know her truth is twisted,
her heart is pure, my life has drifted.
I tried to erase, the one’s they said were not a chase
and ended up disgraced, gone, with someone in my place.
At times I share these wicked thoughts,
with nothing other than the words I jot.
Blinded to how much and all that I’ve got,
I’ve wished and prayed I’ve slept to rot.
This journey sadly, now at end,
I gave it all and more my friends.
My words they weep, ink on paper,
I’ve had my art with me to savor.
Standing in the middle of a blade, cuts.
Oh how low and far we’ve sunk.
These words they sting, once they’ve sung.
I begged my eyes, to keep them tucked,
these tears are heavy and my heart has shrunk.
We make our choices, I made mine,
she chose to leave the hope behind.
I left the room and wished to find,
the door unlocked, she’s shut it tight.
The past it often blinds my mind,
the present more hard to fight.
The choice was easy, had she tried,
one number lost, would win us time.
We’ve spent more time, each others pain,
than raising hairs at the sound of names.
I’m tired and can no longer partake in games,
I’ve tried to be and change my ways,
I’m done being the one that waits.
She used to love me.
The next time I view, a friend between us two,
I’ll know my path is closed and time is through.
It’s time for us to make our choices,
my mind is loud with countless voices.
If it remains like this, it’s all so pointless,
I deserve much more than torment.
Clarity.
Calm.
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