False Wishes
You seem happy
But of course, everyone puts on an act
A full face of non-existent make up
You put it on before you take the first step out your door
I do not despise all happy people
But I prefer the un-happy people the ones who are real
I envy those with joy
The ones who get to go home to a house, one that gives hope
I wished to have a house, somewhere of my own
Every home I have had to had to flee
Not by choice usually
Circumstance leaves me in a cage, A flightless bird
I wish to have a love
But I am inept, uncappable of what I want most
Its been there before but it has never stayed
I wish for him back
I wish to have back the men who broke me
The number keeps growing some I knew forever
Some I don’t know at all
I wish to have power over myself again
Free-will is a lie like Santa to children
Its never really real, anyone can take it away
They can abuse you and leave you broken
I am not glass, I wasn’t fragile nor easy to break
My true wish is to go back
Back to that one moment I ed it all up
There’s always one moment
If I could go back could I change it
Could I stop my inevitable loneliness?
Could I finally take the step out the front door
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