H,O,H
Hard of Hearing.
I went to visit Gran
to brighten up her day.
But that crazy batty women
never hears a word I say.
She moans and groans of aches and pains
and how her bunions hurt, then she'll ask,
"Who is it? Is that you my darling Bert?"
"No, I'll say, it's Sunny, Grandson number two.
I thought I'd pay a visit and spend the day with you.
I've put the kettle on Gran, I'll make a pot of tea."
Then she shouts.
"There are Hob-nobs in the cake tin enough for you and me.
Fetch them in please Keith put them on the floral tray.
Now where's my bloody teeth, I had them earlier today."
"It's Sunny Gran, I tell her. I'm not Keith and I'm not Bert
but there's your bloody teeth Gran in the pocket of you skirt."
I don't mind Grans muddled mind the fact she forgets my name
she can call me what she likes I love her just the same.
Now my Gran is hard of hearing
and batty half the time.
But you know I wouldn't swap her
cause Gran is Gran.
She's the best because she's mine.
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