I love you, I hate you
I love you, I hate you, I want to help you, but at this point you deserve the pain.
Not because you’re a bad person, but because you are putting it on yourself by now.
I will never leave. I will always stay. Even the nights you are begging me to leave you, I wouldn’t consider it for a second, the opportunity never sounding appealing. Leaving you would be like leaving a part of my soul.
I love you. I love your real smile, your laugh, your energy, and personality. I love the way you love. That will never change.
I hate you. You push a feeling of toxicity onto me that I can’t get rid of until we talk. Maybe that’s just me being pathetically dependent, but a relationship of any kind needs communication. And that is something you never put effort into.
I wish I could be there to simply give you a hug. Some form of physical comfort because sometimes that’s all you need. But I can’t. I can however help you. If you would just call or answer my texts.
I go on Do Not Disturb when your mental days come because I cannot stand the pace my heart races when waiting for you to answer even when I logically know you won’t. Not until the next morning or even days from now.
I over love. Especially to you.
I love you. You mean more to me than any family member I’ve had. That might not be saying much considering my family but compared to anyone, even my old best friends or family, I would choose you. So, to know you can’t even respond or just call me sets my heart aflame.
I hate you. Not personally but I hate the fact that you mean so much more to me than I mean to you. I hate the way this relationship has gone. I hate what you’ve done to me emotionally. I hate the attachment to you I have now.
I love you, I hate you.
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