I Made It This Way
As time passes
So do all the new things you learn
Unable to watch you grow
Hurts more than I can handle
Pain so deep
Hidden within
Fighting its way to the surface
Wanting to explode
My heart never as whole
As it did the day I held you in my arms
Looking back at me
Your innocent eyes
So precious ~ So pure
Perfect little baby
My perfect baby boy
How can you forgive me
Letting you go
My son
Never know how much mommy loves you
Replays in my mind over and over again
Why you’re gone
Reality of it all
Mommy let you go
Gave up on what I was born to do…
Have
Love and protect you
All the wonderful things mommy was supposed to do
HATE ME
Kills me inside
Leaves me numb
Realize ~ I didn’t choose you
When all you needed was me
FAILED
I failed at what God blessed me with
Baby boy
Sorry
I miss you everyday
Want to lie down
Just die
Cold
Dark
Alone inside
I made it this way
My baby
Not you….
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