Caregiving “One Sided” at times Especially at bedtime Early and late seem to mean same Considering one’s mind frame In this scenario W is wife H is husband and for life W – “It’s eleven; time for bed and sleep” Wife goes to bed without a peep W – “Why are you still up? It’s one a.m. Now, go to bed; I am W – Out of darkness “Oh, my head hurts” Throb, throb - ”Oh, my head hurts…” Trying to get her bearings stable Lying on floor under table Next to pedestal leg that night And cooking stove on right Throb, throb – “Oh my head hurts” repeated W – “How do I get the “get up+ completed?” To the left sat a shoe so tranquil His shoe with his foot sitting so still W – Calling his name. as throbbing was continuously “Why didn’t you catch me?” H – “It was too fast!” Movement in his foot never passed Like a puppy dog guarding the prey He sat firm lest wife would get away W – “You need to move so I can get up. Get up please, so I can get up” He moved without offering to help Wife with throbbing head did self-help W – “Did you call for assistance?” H -- “I didn’t know how’ with insistence At three am, it was to bed He was tired and she had bump on head A one-sided caregiving experience and A protective co-existence