Positively Deviant
She seems afraid to say too much
and not listen enough.
Perhaps fear of becoming misunderstood
and, worse, too quickly dismissed,
her moment,
even in this small-staged sanctuary,
unnoticed
under-nourished
unfed
unwatered.
She wants to share with us
her deviant dissonant sufficiency
usually seen as negative degenerating autonomy
but, occasionally, in epiphanies of positive
ecologically healthy
revolutionary ZeroZen resonant potential,
Receptive tingling silence
thumping and breathing
singly ringing singing
timelessly herstoric
within domesticating unreal world paradise,
unwombed worn integrity re-memories
echoing between nightseed dreams
and switching off her leftbrain daily alarm.
Until she smiles
I am impressed by her nothing is sadly wrong
yet everything goes unsanctuary
too patriarchally long,
Business As RightWing World gone,
anxiety about personal and political
and social and psychological
and mental and physical health issues
for future climate chaos kids
reversing integrity's robust synergetic win-win potential.
I notice then
soft teeth with nearly infinite hard work
pain
suffering loss,
alone?
Physically alone
and not spiritually unautomated
feminist suffering deviance
often in counterculturing win-win ways
to help others,
more win-lose predominant,
suffer unspoken withdrawal
defeated less.
Once
I see her primal eyes smile
and suddenly my own competitive mistrust,
my own opaque naked fear
goes away,
dismissed by curious eagerness.
Compassion therapeutically co-arises.
I ask if she too suffers
without sufficient release
from mutually withheld win-lose
zero sums of loneliness,
mistrust of fully disclosed intimacy
vulnerability
co-empathic joy.
She continues
now turning toward wealthy belly laughs
co-operating integrity
mutually vibrating abdowomen,
soul sound of synergy's vast wisdom
loudly rooting for potential global health
through her sanctuary solidarity,
still curiously becoming.
She seems fearless to listen too much
and eager to not say
and sing enough
already.
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