Spy
"Clinging to me
Like a last breath you would breathe
You were like home to me
I don't recognize the street
Please don't close your eyes
Don't know where to look without them
Outside the cars speed by
I'd never heard them until now" -Ellie Goulding
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I still believe in the light of your presence
I marvel still when I muse on your dreamy gaze
You remain my hero of attainable delight
As my heart sobs for you this Halloween night
It pains me dear one
It pains me indeed
That there is no poetic line
With embellished ardour of strength,
Or divine power to trace what you were
To what you are
There are no words, and it pains me,
No words from the depths of my wanting soul
That can possibly grant me your return
And while I feel that life has somehow been kinder,
The darksome fires of reality steady still my fears
And I pray that someday, somehow...
That I can make use of these tears
When you were here
I believed in a different kind of fire
I could cradle living joy in my arms
And kiss warm ears that sought my voice
I could shout a prayer of thanks
Instead of moaning a plea for strength
Your cries, prominent and bright
Young, crisp and sweet
And my responses of impressive concern
They fumed you on to me
We led each other to Us
We needed little more than that
But now there is only
me.
And it is now me that calls you
And you come like a confused shadow seeking his other half
Seeking what remains of hope in the wake of evening
I see you still as a pillar
And never as a fragile creature deceased
I only see you through the fires of reality
When I acknowledge the black of others
The power of wrong
Putting out the flames for a while,
I wait for you to come forth in the darkened paths of my mind
Your green eyes glowing in the droopy shade
To meet my own eyes
You come near
The prominent crook of your tail
High and greeting me
Your paws padding gently on the fallen leaves
Indeed you are alive
My mind will not let you die
Because when you were here,
I believed in a different kind of fire
I never imagined life without you,
And still now
I imagine you alive and well
Two silhouettes calling to one another
Meeting in the light of Us
October 31, 2018
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