The Sorting
My chest feels so heavy
Or is it my heart
The tears sit on eyelids
I hope they don’t start
The music plays classic
The mood is so slow
The songs are so saddened
They touch on my sorrow
I’m missing you badly
I need you to hold
If just for a moment
So touching my soul
I feel like escaping
I need to get away
I think when I get home
That I will not stay.
I’m in Sydney right now
With family all around
And though they are so good
I need to be alone.
Where can I escape to?
So that I can think
Somewhere near water
So I can still swim.
I’m fighting these feelings
Of falling apart
The trouble is
I don’t know where to start.
My mind’s in a turmoil
Of questions and doubts
The feelings I’ve out there
All tangled and dark
Don’t know where I’m headed
With these thoughts going on
Do I give what I can?
With no fear and no shame
Do I hide it all here?
Till I know how you feel
Do I toss it away?
Just in case I’m a fool
Do I tell you how I feel?
And risk the reject
Take courage more strongly
And show you I care
Oh God please help me
I’m so muddled up
So much of me wants love
So much of me does not
I wish I could work out
Just what I do want
Then I might find peace
In my scattered up mind
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